Of geysers

I had a picture of all these wells, reaching down to a vast underground source of water. Some of the wells were blocked by rubble so that the water couldnt flow. Some wells had their roots in other wrong relationships, dry and empty.

That was what Justin (a young student pastor at Crossway shared tonite)...he was talking abt how some of us (wells) have had our relationship with God (our vast reserve of strength) blocked up by debris, while others have turned to other relationships as substitutes, and are vacant and empty as a result. I think i've been like that, with my personal 'rubble' being this stubborn belief in my own human logic..it's a real stumbling block to my having a full, robust faith in God.

And then I saw the water gushing out, blowing out all of the rubble so that the wells became geysers of water, the Spirit flowing freely.

As the music played, I wrote this in response:

The debris has cleared
The rubble blown out
Like a bottle of champagne,
the cork has been popped,
the bubbling effervescence has been released.

Released!

Free, free to let Your Spirit flow through,
Oh Lord!
Ain't it wonderful!

riiight back atcha!

it's startling, how God can sometimes use the most unlikely of ppl to tell me something.

Eric was telling us of his 'conversion' experience when i led Bible study on Sunday, and i remembered how skeptical i was at first at his announcement that he had koot tzi. I thot that maybe he was doing it just to please Joanne or get close to her or whatever.

How wrong i was...or so it seems now.

He has this unbridled, bubbling enthusiasm for God that I've missed for so long..just sitting there listening to him really encouraged me. jo was also saying how he kept urging her to talk to their friends abt the Bible, to tell them about Christ, and it just fully amazed me.

i think what whacked me off my ignorant pedestal the hardest was his complaint that he didnt understand Genesis, so then i gave the std answer and 'suggested' he read it once more...BUT he'd already read it 6-7 times..

wheeeewwww...

6 times, in the 2 months since he accepted Christ....sheeeeeesh! And i've only read it, what, like...TWICE???? So shameful right?

at that mo i juz felt totally unworthy to be Eric's 'group leader'...but I think God has really reminded me not to be so cynical and jaded as to think that nothing can surprise me anymore.

AND i once talked to him abt God, ages and ages ago. He didnt say it at the time, but he thought it was a load of BS (quoting verbatim!)..LOL...so glad he didn't tell me that back then.

and now he's my group member, the one unwittingly encouraging me spiritually.

how beautifully ironic.

Seeing the small

These last few days have given me some surprising discoveries...

Our clingstone tree still blossoms! I tend to forget it during winter, when it's black bare branches almost blend into the gloomy skies, but last week I looked out of the kitchen and startlingly noticed the delicate pink blossoms blooming on those thin, gnarly fingers. I've been meaning to go out and take a photo of them actually, but I've been so busy..yet I don't want to miss their initial beauty.

Just now, it started to spit as I walked home from the bus stop. So I thought, well, it's only a short, down hill-ish path, so I might as well run it.

I'm so glad I did. I'd forgotten how exhilarating the first seconds of a run can be. i was wearing leather suede boots, and the orthotic inside broke the impact in a perfect, cushiony way even as I pounded the asphalt.

It's amazing how different those first leaps can be compared to an arduous, gruelling marathon (in my situation, anyway). In that initial minute, the blood pounded thru my drowsy, slumbering body, my breath quickened to suck in the cool air, and i felt so..liberated with the wind generated by my sudden burst of speed.

That sensation is what I imagine those Mazda zoom zooom ads would feel like..a truly alive, alert state for a too-rarely exercised body.

It's a great feeling.

procrastination payback

oh yes..that hackneyed old topic again..the staple of all students (except those rare jewels with ethereal time management)

It's Mon night at 11:50pm, I have a 2000 word lab report due on Wed, and I've only written about 600 words. All of which are just simple, straighforward reporting of results. Wait til tomorrow when I have to go to Bible study preparation AND finish this thing AND a critique of someone else's macro essay. Great, JUST great.

Lack of organisation = last minute (no, second) rush = No sleep => pimples & eye bags (satchels stuffed full of weighty groceries more like) => no time to prepare for ball => look crap on the night => look crap in photos => indelible images of horror

heehee...if only i was this good at useful (ie homework-related) concept maps.

And why am I being like this yet again? EVEN after last sunday's Life App about laziness? Maybe I'm genetically predisposed..the classic excuse for everything.
I think it's friendster..thanks for getting me hooked onto this inane but addictive 'online network' pplz!

Okay, better crawl away to devotions now.
must..pick..eyelids..up...off...the..floor.

Hm..wonder if my missing contact is actually in my eyeball, lodged in the nether regions of my retina with a self-defensive jelly growing around it as i speak. Or maybe it's just dropped out innocently, lying in a dark corner of the bathroom, waiting to be picked up and reunited with its lonely mate.

on second thoughts...

...i think my last post was really vitriolic. Well, at least i know that i was in a poisonous mood when i wrote it..it's especially bad since this friend has been nothing short of a saint to me despite my ugliness. Guess i just really needed somewhere to vent that night..hope she doesn't read it. =(